This was my daily OM yesterday and once again it got me to thinking.  Ahh, we all know that can be a dangerous thing, lol.

January 18, 2007
Considering Others
Reaffirming Our Integrity

Every thought we think and every action we take has an effect on the world around us. To be aware of this is to be conscious of our impact on the people in our lives. Sometimes we just want to do what we want to do, but considering the full ramifications of our actions can be an important part of our spiritual growth and awareness. At first, being more conscious requires effort, but once we have made it a habit, it becomes second nature. The more we practice this awareness of others, the more we find ourselves in easy alignment with our integrity.

Our thoughts are an important place to begin this practice because our thoughts are the seeds of our actions. It is not necessary or beneficial to obsessively monitor all our thoughts, but we can perhaps choose one thought or action per day and simply notice if we are in alignment with this experience of integrity. For example, we may find ourselves replaying a negative encounter with someone in our minds. We may think that this doesn’t affect the person about whom we are thinking, but the laws of energy tell us that it does. When we hold someone negatively in our minds, we risk trapping them in negativity. If we were this person, we might wish for forgiveness and release. We can offer this by simply letting go of the negative thought and replacing it with a wish for healing on that person’s behalf.

With regard to our actions, we may have something difficult to express to someone. Taking the time to consider how we would feel if we were in his or her shoes will enable us to communicate more sensitively than we would if we just expressed ourselves from our own perspective. When we modify our approach by taking someone else’s feelings into account, we bring benefit to that person and ourselves equally. The more we do this, the more we reaffirm our integrity and the integrity of our relationship tothe world.

So one day we are supposed to remember to put ourselves first, to take care of our own psyche.  Then the next day we are to put others first?  Yeah, I know...that isn't exactly what it says.  But if someone has done something hurtful to you, if I understand this correctly, your not supposed to think "negatively" about them?

Well, yeah...I get the fact that you should go to them and express things from your perspective.  But sometimes that can be a bit difficult.  Especially if what was done or said was extremely hurtful, or mean spirited, or just an outright lie.  Especially if you have dealt with similar situations in the past and it has blown up in your face.

More often than not, if you were to go to a person that had done or said something hurtful.  They are going to deny it or become defensive, or try to turn it around on you.  Sometimes approaching or confronting the person with your feelings is just going to make things worse.  

I guess the best thing to do is to analyze the situation.  If what was said or done seems totally out of character for that person, perhaps there is something more to it.  In which case, it would make sense to sit down and talk to that person about the situation.  

However, if it doesn't seem totally out of the realm of possibility, and you think it would only make things worse, then perhaps its best to leave the dog lie.  I mean, why aggravate a growling dog?  Your only gonna get bit.  Especially if your dealing with a demn pitbull.  

We can replace negative thoughts about these people with all the "wishes for forgiveness" and yada yada that we want.  But come on, admit it, sometimes those negative thoughts just feel really good.  Especially when your imagining the conversation and the spiteful things you would like to say, but know that you never would.  

Having negative thoughts or feelings about someonemight not be good "karma", but sometimes it is just too much fun to imagine it and get it out of your system.  Besides, how can you really move past something when the other person won't accept responsibility for what they did or said?  Sometimes that can be more hurtful than the origianal malefaction.

Now, another saying is that the past is the best predictor for the future.  How many of us have lived that and know how true that is?  Well, for me I've found that when someone has done me or a loved one wrong...best just to ignore it.  Whenever I've confronted someone on a "misdeed" it has just blown up in my face.  

And believe me, there were some MASSIVE misdeeds.  I once had a face to face with someone about something extremely hurtful, to my psyche.  It got me nowhere in my search for healing.  As a matter of fact, if I am being totally honest, it actually made things worse (for me).

So I guess there are times when yes, negative thoughts can be hurtful and you should talk to the person about it because it may help.  Yet, there are also times and circumstances when it may just make things worse.  I think it has to be a soul searching decision.  What is best for you?  How many people will it affect?  Sometimes you have to do what is best for you, but sometimes if you think that someone you care about may be hurt, then you have to consider that too.  

If your religious, pray over it.  I like the one email that I've read several times, and that Sascha just sent me again the other day.  P.U.S.H.>>> Pray Until Something Happens.  I think its a good philosophy.  It also gives you the time to stop and take the time to consider everything rather than just going with your gut reaction.  Sometimes we think that going with the gut is the best, but sometimes it can just make things worse and we may say or do something that we end up regretting later.

Oh how I tend to ramble when I write about one of these things.  Sorry for that, especially if you actually sat here and read through all of this.  LOL 

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Yesterday I recently came across a very thought provoking journal.  Go check it out>>> The wisdom of a distracted mind.

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Good news, Rylie seems to be doing better.  She still is fighting me on taking her meds, but she is doing really great with the breathing treatments.

Bad new, Papa has been in and out of the emergency room.  The ambulance came and got him again yesterday morning.  Apparently his body is having trouble eliminating liquids from his body, which in turn pushes everything up into his lungs and diaphram.  The doctor let him go home yesterday.  Then phone rang this morning at 6:30 AM or so and they had to call the ambulance again. 

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Have a wonderful Friday and a spectacular weekend!
Hugs!